Santa’s younger brother finally speaks out (it’s not all that bad)

If ye want to know why I enjoy the Christmas season so much more during the past decade, then glance upwards at my image on this page and you will agree, I think, that at least to the rounded eyes of a child, I do nowadays bear a certain similarity to Santa Claus his own self. That photo is some years old now and I am somewhat more silvery and a little plumper of cheek nowadays. Sometimes Santa Claus is around and you don’t even know it. Staff answer almost 100,000 phone calls and receive more than 140,000 emails from families around the world.

So the small ones dangling at the end of their mothers’ shopping arms do tend to stop in their tracks when they see me on the town streets or in the shopping centers. I don’t think so. I’m getting with the program,” the Jolly Old Gent told reporters, with a wink. The Believe-O-Meter, of course, is the one-of-a-kind device that gauges the strength and frequency of belief in Santa Claus and gives his sleigh enough thrust to travel around the world in a single night. This year, the unworthies are to receive small aerosol canisters that spray uncontrolled puffs of greenhouse gas. After 600 youngsters, your ability to communicate in cogent sentences suddenly gets tied up. They radiate the unspoken message, “Omigod, there IS a Santa Claus and I’m looking at him!!” That is pleasantly serene. Unlike any other pilot, Santa has special permission from the FAA to fly thousands of domestic and international short-haul and long-range flights in one night. “Sure, everyone thinks Prentice is a great guy and, from the Conservatives’ standpoint, he did a bang-up job in Environment. But the youngsters just accept it.